Topic: Commentary and Essays on Life and Events
 

 
This Blog has run for over 70 years of Print, Radio and Internet commentary. "Topic" is a daily column series written and presented by Andrew McCaskey for radio broadcast and print since February, 1932.
 
 
   
 
Thursday, October 30, 2003
 
COMEDY TEAM


Certainly there must be a few of you out there who can recall a comedy team which worked under the strange name of "Stoopnagle and Bud."

They were popular during the same general period that "Amos and Andy" held forth as rulers of the radio waves. As I remember it, they were "discovered" by comedian Fred Allen and, for a time, they appeared as guests on his show.

The character Stoopnagle had a title. I don't remember if it was intended to be a military rank or one associated with industrial or commercial success, which was not uncommon in that era. He was always referred to as "Colonel" Stoopnagle. Every program began with his playing of electric organ music with a stentorian voice-over which said:

"You are listening to Colonel Lemuel Q. Stoopnagle at the console of the mighty gas pipe organ..." He knew only one composition which was a two-fingered, one-foot arrangement of the nursery rhyme titled: "Mama Sent Me To The Spring." Bud acted as the straight man most of the time and the conversations dealt with events of the day and the condition of society in a charmingly evasive and vague manner.

The Colonel's wisdom was available to listeners who might - or might not - write inasking for his help. Such "letters" served as springboards for learned lectures on or around just about any sub ject. He did Daffy-nitions, too. For Example:

Gasoline - “Gasoline is what, if you don’t use good in your car, it won’t run as well as if.”

Dust - “Dust is mud with the water squoze out.”

One more: Jazz - “Jazz music is a lot of noise in a hurry.”

Stoopnagle and Bud were generous with words praising the products made of their “sponsor.”

Listeners never quite knew what that product was, because it was a multi-purpose invention designed to benefit mankind in many ways. As was common in radio of that day the name of the product was often spelled out rather than merely being said. It was Phoithboinder”. It was spelled each time as “P-h-o-i-t-h-Paragraph-Boin-der.” Satisfied buyers from all aroud the world praised it for its superior qualities - as a cure for Ingrown Toenails or as being useful in covering pantry shelves in an effort to thwart the ravages of spilled jams and jellies; as a car polish or as a beetle bane, bug killer, or as a birthday cake decoration for someone you disliked.

I must take the time to Google-ize “Stoopnagle and Bud”. I don't remember the name of the perfomers who did all those voices and characterizations so well. Or course, as many of you already realize, I tend to forget that much of what I write about actually took placed half a century , or more, ago.

Just for repeated laughs, how many of you remember Colonel Lemuel Q. Stoopnagle and his buddy Bud?

A.L.M. October 29, 2003 [c499wds]
Comments:
I remember their goofy inventions, even though I was only 12 or 13 a that time.
How about: Round dice for people who would rather play marbles.
Or: Dominoes without dots for people who want to play in the dark.
Aaron Kaplan

email: aaronkaplan@fea.net
 
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