DEADLY DATA Some rather unusual requests are quite often made to those who operate or are employed by funeral homes. I have, perhaps, more than average awareness of that place in life's employment areas, because I worked at a funeral home during the early days of my so-called “retirement”.
I was one of the older people hired to drive any of the numerous cars and trucks the firm had to keep active and worthy at all times. We served as hosts at night time when family member might choose to visit in a chapel area concerning a family member in our care. We were there to talk with the bereaved family members to help make the situation less burdensome for everyone. One afternoon “Personnel” or the “Front Office“ asked me if I happened to be squeamish about working with bodies in the morgue. They had found I had worked at a military hospital's morgue during World War II and from that time I was called upon to "assist" prep work at that level. I remember one week-end when we have eleven bodies in our care and needed additional helping hands. On the whole it was a serious type of work, but even there and much needed, a sense of humor its soothing self.
One of the most sought after individuals on any funeral home staff is that person who will be the very last to touch the open casket, check it and perhaps re-arrange it deftly then closed and seal it forever. It is not uncommon for that person to fulfill the wish of a family member by adding the dead person's favorite childhood toy or some small trinket as a symbol of special joy that person had known.
I remember one case in which the departed one provided the funeral home with several copies of neatly typed instruction for the digging of her grave. Details and exact measurements were attached in black,India ink drawings showing that we were to dig her grave to the usual depth, but that the floor had to be slanted by four inches toward the East. She explained her request by revealing that she slept on a bed with the head legs resting on two bricks and if she slept on a flat surface she would be "sick to her stomach" and unable to rest. She provided us with two copies. The one was plainly marked as being intended "For Office Use"; the other a "Gravedigger's Work Copy."
I am pleased to report we filled her request. Under the end of her casket two bricks are well placed and they show some wear from the weigh of heavy headboard. They slant her toward the rising sun each morning - just right.
A.L.M. March 7, 2006 [c468wds]
