THE GRATE PYRAMIDS Our U.S.D.A. or some other agriculturally-oriented branch of our expansive shade tree of governmental ever-growing in foggy-bottomed rotation in Washington, D. C. started to emulate the work of the rulers of ancient Egypt by building pyamids honoring the foods we consume and which many of us have been accused of worshipping in a sense.
For some reason which I have never been an enthusiastic booster of their food pyramid charts through the years but now that have grown older my dimensions have changed somewhat. Like it or not, I am now eligible to be called f-a-t. I say have come around to admitting my general physical dimension shave exhanged somewhat. My physical structure is a few inches shorter North-to-South - head to toe - or that my exercise routines (Ha!) my work habits...my play habits....snack habits and all my habits in toto. It's my East -West dimentions which are proving to be troublesome. In the equatorial line area dominated by belt pressures I can work miracles to lessen the distance by several inches between where I stand an Venus off low in the last days of the month of November.
When one gets fat, one also learns to talk about big, ponderous, or outsize things.. We learn to mention Hummers rather than Jeeps; limos rather than boxy, little half-cars. We are selective and try to speak of speak mainly of larger items appoved by today's society. Think of Grand Canyon and not of your local landfill; think Niagra instead of a kiddie pool shower. on TV screens and to minimize [rise for skinny stars. Self-esteem is part of this overweight problem. Hire yourself as a sort of at-the-ready PR person.
Sooner or later, I suppose, I will have to look, up one of the latest pyramid charts and take it seriousl and not let it grate on my sensibilities. I do think they known what the answer might be. The old maxim is still with us: “Eat less; exercise more.” One of those pyramids things calls for five fresh fruits daily. What am I expected to do: gluttonize on five Concord grapes at one-and-a portion-of-another per meal?
A.L.M. November 30, 2005 [c385wds]
