THE WANT ADS The classified ads in most newspapers tell us a great deal about who and what we really are these days of the summer of '05.
First, the amazing diversity and variety offered reveals how complicated our "simple" lives have become.
In the "For Rent" and "For Sale" items one is forced to describe what he means by an "apartment" and a "house". They come in all sizes - from too small to too large, it seems. If you haven't looked at them recently, the prices will shock you. What the owner thinks he is offering and what the renter wants to take on as a monthly obligation , are two widely divergent quantities, it would appear. Expect to pay $500 or so per month - and up.
Prices start at around that for both and when utilities and basic maintenance costs are factored in the finished price is more or less prohibitive for the majority of us. Most owners place a high value on their offering and would expect to do some haggling or bargaining along the way before a final figure is reached. If you are not a born "horse trader" such bickering over price does not come easy for you.
Nothing tells more about people that the luxury item ads. Musical Instruments - usually pianos, organs, drum sets and electric guitars, these days, are , perhaps, the most common in that group and each represents a drama of family life in which parents want their child to perform and the kid is far more interested in sports or dating.
There is a steady flow of excess making up much of this type. Weight reduction machines, step mechanisms, presses , powered platforms and ski gadgets - all are advertised regularly and usually they are said to be in "top notch" or "like new " condition - as are the musical instruments - "used for three lessons only".
In recent years ads of a personal nature have become so popular that they have been granted full-page sections in many papers. I hated to see this happen because the not-too-subtle innuendo of such ads puts them on the verge of porn and there is no sign than such a page to tell me that the paper is "hurting" and grabbing at random straws to stay in existence. In several such cases, I have seen them change ownership shortly after doing so. It has been said that shopping centers have a use-life of about twenty years and when the karate parlors, fortune tellers, herbal medication stores, and gaming places start moving in it is time to tear out and re-do the entire place or shut it down.
Watch the classified ads to see if your local paper is on the way out.
A.L.M. June 15, 2005 [c466wds]
